Couple Communication Behaviors During Sexual and Nonsexual Discussions and Their Association with Relationship Satisfaction

The quality of communication between romantic partners has consistently been found to be associated with relationship wellbeing and stability. Studies on sexual and nonsexual communication, however, have typically assessed communication skills and behaviors using self-report measures. The use of observational methods has several advantages, including the ability to capture and allow for the independent coding of both partners' communication behaviors. With few exceptions, research applying observational methods has not distinguished between sexual and nonsexual communication behaviors. In the present study, we asked 126 young, mixed-sex couples to engage in sexual and nonsexual conflict discussions. The two 7-min discussions were videotaped and rated by trained coders on nine behavioral dimensions using an adaptation of the specific affect coding system (Gottman & Krokoff, 1989) and the system for coding interactions and family functioning (Lindahl & Malik, 2001). Coder ratings applied to the discussion as a whole. Analyses included factor analysis on the behavioral dimensions and multilevel modeling incorporating the actor-partner interdependence model (APIM). We found significant differences in how couples interacted during the two discussions, with more positive (affectionate and validating) and less negative behaviors during sexual discussions as compared to nonsexual discussions. In both women and men, expressions of positivity during the two types of conflict discussions were associated with higher relationship satisfaction. Gender differences were found in the association between negative behaviors during sexual discussions and relationship satisfaction, with men but not women's negative behaviors being associated with lower relationship satisfaction. These findings point at distinct qualities of sexual communication and its association with couples' relational well-being and contribute to a better scientific understanding, with clinical relevance, of sexual and nonsexual communication.