Sexual appetite: A technique for disarming resistance in the treatment of sexual complaints

This paper describes the sensual feeding exercise, a powerful therapeutic technique that reveals unconscious feelings operating within people's relationships. The exercise acts as a surrogate to sexual interaction, eliminating the pressure of genital sexual performance and thereby richly illuminating the emotional impediments to intimacy. Using this technique, the therapist instructs the members of a couple to feed one another, in a time and place of their choosing between therapy sessions. The couple has a spontaneous response to the exercise, different from the response elicited in discussing their sexual problem. The parallel between the process of feeding and the act of sex allows patients to learn a great deal about sexuality through non-threatening playful interaction. The paper reports on two treatment processes which led to greater emotional openness and expression in the couples' relationship, without improving sexual satisfaction. The sensual feeding exercise helpfully addressed the issue of sexual satisfaction by revealing the unconscious impediments to sexual expression.