Coercion in families and child resistance to contact with a parent after family separation

Family courts face a rare but vexing problem when children angrily refuse contact with a parent after parents separate. In this paper I discuss the associations among child emotional reactivity, child rejection of parent demands, adverse parenting behavior, and coercive control in intimate partner relationships. Decades of clinical and developmental research have explored how adverse parenting behavior and domestic violence impact child development. Children are more likely to have problems with defiance when parents use negative behavior to exert control over vulnerable children. Similarly, childhood exposure to a caregiver who has exerted or does exert coercive control over an intimate partner positively predicts child behavior problems and vulnerability to excessive fear and anger. The paper concludes with a brief discussion of assessing coercion and helping children who reject contact with a parent.